Nice one Cyrille

Back in Birmingham for a couple of days - mainly to go to a friend's wedding. Good time had by all at a traditional British bash - nice church, heartfelt speeches, disco and conga line. The day had a nice vibe.

Father of the Bride's speech commented that all her family were West Brom fans, and all the Groom's were Coventry. How can this difference be reconciled? He produced a photo of Baggies and Sky Blue legend Cyrille Regis and hoped they could all unite behind him.

A couple of hours later - just before the disco - Father of the Bride took the microphone and referred back to Cyrille. Then, in one of the most surreal moments I've encountered at a wedding, he announced, "Ladies and Gentlemen, he is here tonight. Cyrille Regis!" And in he walked - still looking as young as ever.

Incredible - on so many levels...

Mission of madness?

I've just watched Bear Grylls:Mission Everest which I recorded from yesterday and I don't think I've seen such a couple of slightly posh daft sods in my life. Many of Bear Grylls' films are quite entertaining -this was, but for the wrong reasons.

The idea - for exactly what reason was never clear - was to try to fly over Everest using paramotors. Imagine a person with a parachute and a massive fan on their back and you get the sort of idea. Bear's companion in this folly was Gilo Cardozo whose job was to design the motors and who seemed to have modelled himself on the Harry Enfield 'Tim-nice-but-dim' character.

Firstly, one engine froze prior to testing in an industrial cold wind tunnel - a fairly major design you might have thought given they needed to operate in extreme cold. This meant that they eventually turned up in Nepal with one engine that hadn't been tested... or run... at all.

Then their dry run in the Alps failed due to strong winds - though these were winds that were lower that they expected to find at Everest. Bear realised that the wind might actually be a problem so instead of flying over Everest, they decided they'd fly at a greater height, but a few miles to the south. Didn't that negate the original idea?

Finally they take off - that's after,

• having had trouble with the weather balloons they were using to assess the weather and find a suitable 'window'. Again, surely another fairly fundamental problem??
• having had Gilo make last minute adjustments to one engine whilst it was on Bear's back as he was about to take off - talk about at the 11th hour!
• Gilo's wife - who for some reason had come along on the trip - had a nosebleed just as Gilo was about to take off.

Having taken off their radio communication then began to break up and they had to do '3 clicks for yes and 2 for no'. Now most Everest expeditions manage to have radio communications so why did their's fail? A little later Gilo's engine - the one which had to be rebuilt and hadn't been tested or even flown since it froze at the wind tunnel - packed up and he had to descend early. Oh, yes the altimeters also froze and stopped working at 19,000 feet - so they had no idea how high they were and wouldn't know if they'd achieved their target height until after they landed!

The final 'irony' was that having landed when they looked at the equipment to try to see how high Bear had gone.... they discovered the altimeter had stopped working completely at around 25,000 feet - we'd never know if he'd done it or not!

Absolutely unbelievable - the overall impression the programme left me was that 2 slightly barmy posh blokes had gone off on some under prepared jolly jape. Harry Hill's TV Burp - consistently one of the funniest things on television - had got huge laughs from Bear Grylls previous series. Can't wait to see this weekend's edition - he should have a field day!

There Will Be Blood

The latest film from PT Anderson tells the story of Daniel Plainview in the early part of the 20th century as he searches for oil, and particularly as he drills for oil in one area of California.

The film has had great reviews and Daniel Day-Lewis gives a mesmeric performance in the lead role, for which he quite rightly won the Best Actor Oscar. Some parts of the film are excellent and the period is wonderfully evoked - the power of striking oil is wonderfully captured and put across on the screen.

However, as with No Country For Old Men, I just couldn't warm to the film overall. None of the characters are particularly likable and I'm not sure I care what happens to them - which is surely a major flaw in a film?

Yes it's better than 99% of the films currently on release, and yes there are some interesting subplots - the father/son relationship and the role of the local minister being two of them - but at the end I couldn't help thinking that I seen a cross between Citizen Kane and Dallas. Harsh? Undoubtedly - but honest.

Does my bum look big in this?

Now, I'm rarely at the height of fashion. Like Jeremy Paxman I'm more likely to worry about the gusset support of trusty M&S underwear than whether I'm wearing the latest 'must have of the season'.

However, a bizarre combination of an upcoming wedding invitation and me needing a new suit means that I'm unexpectedly at the forefront of fashion - I've popped into the newly opened Banana Republic store on Regent Street.

It's basically a smarter version of Gap - but I know what I like and this sort thing appeals to me. I do note, however, that even a new store, whose assistants were good in showing me where things were, still has that universal issue of not having enough tills open when I actually want to pay for the stuff.

My descent into middle aged grumpiness continues...

A summer sport

Know that Rugby League is now supposed to be a summer sport - but can someone please tell the weather?

Go to see my local Super League team for the second time this season - and for the second time it's absolutely freezing. Never mind the players - the cheerleaders must be in danger of hypothermia as we got four seasons in the space of one match.

Oh yes - and an inept second half performance also meant defeat...

Website of the week

It's not really a website - but enjoyable nonetheless.

Forest for the trees

Back from a long weekend at Center Parcs, Longleat to celebrate a 'landmark' birthday of a relative.

Never been to Center Parcs before and have to admit I found it a bit strange. It's well set out and there is plenty to do - even the really bad weather we had over the weekend didn't stop us from doing anything planned - but it feels a bit artificial, pretending to be remoter than it actually is. Is it really any different to a Butlins resort? Though perhaps a bit more middle class!

However, as with most breaks it isn't so much where you are as who you're with and a lovely time was had. For this sort of thing - a celebratory long weekend with multigenerational ages - it was ideal. A thoroughly enjoyable few days.

Duchamp, Man Ray, Picabia

Having had a pretty hectic week it's nice to toddle off to an evening showing of the current exhibition at Tate Modern.

Now, what is art? The never ending question in modern art, and one which I'm not going to solve now. All I will say is that the famous Duchamp Fountain (a urinal on its back) is not art - if it were it makes B&Q and Wickes wonderful chains of accessible art galleries.

However, at this exhibtion in amongst all the emperor's new clothes there are some wonderful items - particularly the impressionist pieces in room 3 and some of the Man Ray photography.

If you like modern art - and lots do as this was the busiest evening viewing I'd ever been to at Tate Modern - then you'll like this. If not, this exhibition will just annoy rather than convert you.

We interrupt this service...

Nothing on the blog front as it's been a very busy week. Hopefully the normal service of my erratic, and occasionally mildly amusing, blog posting will resume shortly.

In the meantime - a brief interlude.



Remember - this is what television used to show. Better times??

Juno

A quirky off-beat 16 year old finds she is pregnant - what happens next? Juno is a bit strange - lovely but strange. What she should do? Abortion is thought about - she even makes it as far as the clinic - but elects for a 'good old fashioned quick adoption'. That's the story in a nutshell.

I'm intrigued as how this movie was pitched to the funders; teenage pregnancy and adoption don't immediately sound full of laughs or good 'box office'. But don't let the premise of this film put you off as you will miss a film that handles a delicate subject very well - far better than I've seen for a long time either in film or on TV.

As well as having many jokes, it's also a thoughtful character driven piece - there is not a weak link in the excellent cast. Ellen Page is superb, mixing emotion with humour as her character deals with her situation. Michael Cera and Jason Bateman - two of the actors in the very funny and much missed Arrested Development TV series - are good value. Additionally, Jennifer Garner, Allison Janney and JK Simmons all make the best use of their limited screen time to get their characters across.

Its 12A rating has raised a few eyebrows given the subject material - and in the screening I went to the largest demographic was 11-14 year olds by far - however, the film's honest portrayl of a sensitive situation is so good, and so well handled, that I hope many more see it.

A delightful, quirky and funny gem that tenderly deals with a potentially difficult subject.

All about timing

Another four year wait then...

;o)

You know you're old (part 94)

I realised that every item of clothing I had on - with the sole exception of my cufflinks - is from Marks and Spencer...

You can almost hear the male menopause - along with the inapproriate purchase of leather trousers to regain lost youth - approaching...

Website of the week

Do you ever wonder where you could find someone who looked like Kenny Rogers?

Thankfully there are professionals.

Doing what you can

Well last night wasn't my normal Friday night - I was sat in a church listening to a black former Zimbabwean international cricketer sign Nessum Dorma. I've just thoroughly enjoyed An Evening with Henry Olonga.

I saw Henry Olonga play in the 1999 Cricket World Cup - always an erratic bowler his first spell had been pretty poor. He then came on, took 3 wickets in an over, bowling India out and handing Zim the victory. At the 2003 World Cup he and Andy Flower wore black armbands to highlight the situation in Zim - at great personal cost to them both.

Now based in the UK I'd heard Henry speak and sing a few years ago. Funny, articulate and passionate I was impressed with how he came across - and even more surprised with the beauty of his singing voice. Now pursing a musical career, he continues to raise awareness about the situation in Zim.

Last evening - organised by the charity Tearfund who are doing a lot of work in the country - beautifully mixed song, humour and cricket as well as continuing to highlight the problems in Zim. With several ex-pats in the audience (there is a large SA & Zim community in SW London) some moments were very poignant - during one song the woman next to me was weeping - but there was also humour. At one point Henry's comment to the Zims in the audience "do you remember growing up when we used to laugh at Zambia" brought some chuckles (trust me, if you're African it is one of those funny truisms) as did the joke about the name of Idi Amin's boat? Idi-yacht.

As Henry said, he didn't feel he could contribute much to solving the situation in Zim back in 2003 when he and Andy Flower made their stance - but he did what he could. A thought for us all.

Old Mother Hubbard?

This is the current state of my fridge.

I need to get to out more...

...if nothing else...

...to buy some groceries.

Website of the week

I've been a bit lax with these of late. Anyway...

...if we campaign enough perhaps this could be in the 2012 Olympics.

Elgar and the the Apostles

Last night spent a lovely evening in the wonderful surroundings of the Cathedral and Abbey Church of St Albans listening to the Hertfordshire Chorus perform The Apostles by Elgar.

It's a work that I don't think is performed too often - the need for 6 soloists, a full choir and orchestra suggest it's quite a project for a choral group to tackle.

A thoroughly enjoyable evening - good company and an interesting piece beautifully performed in a very appropriate location.

Bah, humbug...

;o)

Enjoy the video below - from the ever reliable and thought provoking people at PostSecret.

You know you're geting old when...

Got the following text yesterday - this is exactly what it said, punctuation, spaces and all.

That gr8 news!luk4wad2it!v.xtid!hopeurok:-)

It took me about 5 minutes to work it out...

Surf's up?

The weather is still glorious as I have a wander around the seaside town of Bournemouth. First stop is the slightly strange Russell-Cotes Museum.

It's the sort of museum that Britain does well - small and basically a collection of eclectic stuff that a couple of perhaps slightly eccentric Victorians gathered on their travels. With lots of paintings, pottery and knick-knacks it is a lovely little place to waddle around. That it "is a combination of Italianate villa and Scottish Baronial set in grounds incorporating a Japanese garden" adds to its charm. I head down into the town and then take a stroll along the pier and the sea front - on a cool, crisp, sunny winter's morning its a lovely place to be.

For the past couple of days I'd been staying at the Urban Beach Hotel - an achingly trendy 'boutique hotel' which has had great things written about it in the Times, Guardian, and Elle. It's lovely - the rooms are the nicest I've stayed in for a while - but I'm not sure, and I don't think it is either, whether it's a small hotel with a great bar, or a great bistro bar with rooms attached. It's in Boscombe rather than Bournemouth proper, and has a laid back surf theme. The fact that the surf is minimal on this part of the south coast doesn't actually matter - currently there are plans to build an artificial reef in the sea which will create more surf. Even without that I did manage to spot some hardy surfers in the morning. If you're looking for somewhere different to stay on the south coast, you could do a lot worse.

Refreshed after a brief break, I head back to west London.

A place by the sea

A stunning crisp and sunny day greets me as I head out along parts of the South Coast I probably haven't seen since I was a small boy, if indeed at all. First up is Poole.

Driving around Sandbanks - the really posh bit of the south coast and apparently some of the most expensive real estate on the planet - I can see why Harry Redknapp didn't take the Newcastle job. The north east is lovely, but on a beautiful sunny day the views across Poole Harbour are difficult to beat. Bizarrely, whilst driving around Poole Bay on such a crispy, clear and sunny winter's morning I'm somewhat reminded of Vancouver...

After a pootle around Poole - really strangely Poole High Street has a level crossing slap in the middle of it - and coffee and cake at the lovely LopLop Gallery Cafe, I head further around the coast. Unfortunately I can't go to the ghost village of Tyneham - well it is in the middle of a military firing range - but end up in Swanage.

There is something bittersweet about visiting coastal towns out of season. The delight of having the place almost to yourself on such a beautiful day is tempered by the thought that the place has seen better times. Swanage is a beautiful location and must have been amazing to have seen in its heyday when the train unloaded all the holidaymakers. It still retains a charm, but given you can fly across Europe for cheaper than a return train fare from London to Gatwick, it's fair to say that it's unlikely Swanage - like many once great seaside resorts - will see the glory days again.

Howard's Way?

Decide to head out of the city for a couple of days and down to a part of the country I've never been to before, the New Forest and East Dorset.

Potter around Lymington for a while and take in the delightful St Barbe Museum. It's the sort of wonderful local museum that small towns throughout the UK do so well - often supported by groups of hearty volunteers.

It's never going to be a glamorous uber-museum but it's a lovely, well kept small museum full of local history and I warmly recommend it should you ever find yourself in the area. There are also numerous coffee shops in which to refresh afterwards - one of the observations the museum makes is that there are now more coffee shops on Lymington High Street than pubs, a major social change of the past 10 years!

The area is obviously where significant parts of the UK yachting set head to - not a social strata I'm exactly familiar with. Hey I was brought up in Birmingham, not exactly a coastal area!

Head a bit further down the coast. A bracing stroll gives lovely views across to foreign parts - well, the Isle of Wight - and the Needles are clearly visible on the horizon. Continue down the coast and head to where I've booked to stay.

The Secret of Life...

... is a good cup of coffee.

Slightly unexpectedly I head off to The Borderline to see Gretchen Peters live. Doubt you will have heard of her - so the obtuse reference above to one of her songs is doubly pointless - but she is a Nashville singer songwriter and you may have heard one of her songs at some point.

The support act is Edwina Hayes an acoustic/folk singer songwriter from Yorkshire. She has a wonderful voice and a lovely sense of humour. "Most of my songs are pretty depressing. They're all about either unrequited love, falling for someone whose not interested or having a crush on someone", she says with a wonderful laugh.

Gretchen claims she is under the weather but she - along with her excellent keyboard player - deliver a wonderful set. Again there is a good use of humour between the songs. Overall a lovely concert highlighting the delightful talents of two excellent female singer songwriters.

End the night with friends watching a gripping Superbowl match. The Patriots - so near to the perfect season...

Eventually a long Sunday ends...

Mind the gap

Been a busy and full week. Various things happening at work which are requiring a bit of thought and judgement - always a challenge.

Have a visitor for a couple of nights so tried a bit of London culture on them. Heading over the Thames to the South Bank we get to see the wonderful view that London has to offer from one of several bridges - I've been in London for a number of years but seeing the view always still impresses.

We head to Tate Modern and admire the crack in the floor- Shibboleth. Is it art? Well if it is, then the UK motorway network must be the biggest piece of art installation in the world. The visitor seems intrigued by the crack - we head upstairs and see Henri Matisse's Snail but my visitor is less impressed.

I like it - it's one of my favourite pieces in the Tate. Guess it's just me and my 'fancy London ways'....

Website of the week

What's the best - chess or boxing?

Well, in the words of Harry Hill, "there's only one way to settle this...... fight!"

Welcome to the world of Chessboxing.

No Country For Old Men

Out hunting a man comes across a drug deal gone wrong - dead bodies everywhere - and finds a bag containing $2million. Conscience forces him to later return with water for a survivor. He is too late, but returning to the scene he is spotted by people wanting their money back. So begins the long hunt in the latest film from the Coen brothers.

This film has garnered virtually universal great reviews and is one of the leading Oscar contenders. It is beautifully shot, superbly acted - Tommy Lee Jones, Woody Harrelson and Kelly MacDonald are all excellent - and has the greatest haircut you've seen in a film for years. But...

I seem to be in the minority who like this film, think it has lots of fantastic components, but just feel it is a long way short of the master piece everyone else thinks it is. It is definitely not a bad film; it will deservedly win several Oscars (though overlooking Kelly MacDonald for a Best Supporting Actress nomination is almost scandalous) and apparently is a very faithful adaptation of the book. But for me it is a case of the sum being less than the parts.

Should you see it? Yes. Should you herald it as a masterpiece? I have my doubts - in short I preferred Fargo.

Website of the week

Set those books free and back into the wild - enjoy Bookcrossing.

Downs on the way up

On a last minute whim I headed off to the Blue Square Conference South table top clash of Lewes v Hampton and Richmond - first and third respectively. Both teams have, in the past couple of years, made good progress up the non-league ladder and both are now on the cusp of the Conference.

Lewes has a small, neat ground and even with grey January skies you can see beauty of the South Downs all around. The chalky soil obviously helps the drainage as the pitch was lovely and green, even after all the recent rain - a real credit to the club and a pitch many clubs in higher leagues would be proud of.

The game was a stop/start affair. A fussy referee meant that it often didn't flow and, even though the match was far from dirty, his refereeing led to several bookings and a sending off. I suspect he was being assessed. Hampton scored twice - after 6 minutes in each half - and Lewes rarely threatened to scored. Their solitary goal was in the 89th minute and was from a soft and fortunate penalty. Overall an interesting game rather than a crowd pleaser - Hampton looked professional and Lewes did not look the run away league leaders their currently are.

Fluffy

One of life's little pleasures is putting on a brand new pair of socks for the first time. Clean and fresh - lovely. Of course, a little pleasure often comes with a little pain - which brings me to the annoyance that is sock fluff.

When you take off that new pair for the first time, all sorts of bits of fluff are left. Whilst for many blokes picking debris from between their toes could no doubt develop into a minor hobby - for me I just find the whole thing incredibly annoying.

Why does it happen? Why is it only socks and not new T shirts or new trousers? Do women have the same problem with tights?

I know, it's incredible, blogging has reached a new level of pointless banality!

A moment of your time

At home. The phone rings.

"Hello. I'm conducting a survey about transport on behalf of Transport for London. Can I ask you a couple of questions?"

"OK, I can answer a couple of questions." (After all, I've just been crammed on an overcrowded tube train after a 15 minute wait for one I could actually get on.)

"It'll take about 10-15 minutes."

"Eh, that's more than a couple of questions then."

I hang up.

Charlie Wilson's War

I've not seen many films for a while but the start of the new year heralds several movie releases I'm eager to see - first up is Charlie Wilson's War.

Based on the true story of how an alcoholic, womanising Texan Congressman managed to covertly fund the Afghan's war against the Soviet invasion. Tom Hanks is excellent as the eponymous lead - the right mixture of likeability and sleaze - and Julia Roberts is on good form as rich communist hating Texan belle. However, the complete star of the film is the wonderful Phillip Seymour Hoffman as the CIA agent Gust.

Witty lines, a good script by the West Wing's Aaron Sorkin which wears its liberal heart on its sleeve, and the fascination that Charlie Wilson did actually exist, all make for a good film. The ending is not quite satisfying, but the movie whips along and if the other films of 2008 are like this, then we're in for a good year.

Walk in the woods

Time to remember that just a stone's throw away from the M25, and under the Heathrow flightpath, there is still rural England.

Oh yes..... and weekend retreats for the Chancellor...

Writers Bloc

Scott from Neighbours, Tiffany from Eastenders, Mike Baldwin from Corrie, the bloke from The Full Monty and, most bizarrely, Mrs McClusky from Grange Hill - you have to say that Moving Wallpaper/Echo Beach had some inspired casting.

Too early to say whether the new ITV series will work - and whatever you think of the general rubbish ITV put out, this is a brave piece of commissioning - but there seems to have been a glut of TV shows looking at writing and making TV shows.

Channel 4 had Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip. With Aaron Sorkin and the West Wing team behind it - and the lovely Lucy Davis continuing to move away from "Dawn from The Office/Hayley from The Archers" territory - you feel it should have worked. Somehow it didn't, it just didn't gel and I wonder whether a similar fate awaits the Cornish based soap and the accompanying behind the scenes mockumentary.

The best show of this sort - and one of the best shows on TV at the moment - is 30 Rock on C5 late on Thursday nights. A witty, funny look behind the scenes of a Saturday Night Live type show, it has a cracking lead character in Liz Lemon - played by the superb writer/producer Tina Fey - and an amazing turn by Alec Baldwin as the company boss. Definitely worth watching.

It's a kettle

Got a new kettle for Christmas - oh yes, it's all luxury, excitement and glamour chez smittyonline. Noticed that it proudly comes with "Stealth Technology".

It's a kettle - I want to make a cup of tea with it, not invade another country.

Website of the week

For those of you who haven't yet taken down your Christmas lights - a warning.

It's a slippery slope, and before long you could end up here.

And a bit off the top?

After taking a stroll around a pretty part of north Surrey I wander down the high street of the nearby town. Someone is handing out flyers.

"Would you be interested in a discount at a local hairdressers?"

Now, admittedly it was dark, but really! And after yesterday's horoscope...

And your lucky colour is...

Reading the Metro on the way to work - it has a pretty decent film section on a Friday - I noticed my horoscope said,

"It’s only the fourth and you’re restless already. Organise something unusual. If you can’t manage that, change your hairstyle."

Not entirely useful for me then...

Clippety Clop

Walking to the tube station tonight a couple of mounted policemen trotted by. Noticed that on their boots/stirrups they had the little red flashing lights so beloved of cyclists - made me smile.

Didn't notice if they had headlights though...

Jumpers for goalposts

Prior to the Aldershot v Woking game there was a short service to remember not only Phil O'Donnell, the Motherwell FC captain who died at the weekend (see here), but two people linked with Aldershot Town - director Paul Muddell and former player Gordon Henry. Conducted by the club chaplain, the service was a poignant moment, and the minute's silence was impeccably observed by everyone in the crowd of 4,728. There is something powerful about a minute's silence at a football ground - today even more so.

I'd gone to the game because I want to see more live football in 2008. For me there is something special, something real about the non-league game, and the nearest match of interest was Aldershot v Woking. Football in Aldershot has a fascinating history as the original club went bust back in 1992 and a new club was formed. It has been working its way up the non-league pyramid ever since and now finds itself on the brink of a return to league football as it is currently atop the Blue Square Premier Conference.

The ground is a throw back to the past, sandwiched as it is between the railway line and a 1950s style office block. It has four small stands, all tight to the pitch, and with a bank holiday local derby crowd, the ground was comfortably full. It's an earthy ground - hot chocolate could be purchased from a food van for 80p and the experience is one of real football, a world away from the monied glamour of the sanitised Premiership.

The match was fine - both teams play a good passing game. Aldershot scored twice in the first half but Woking scored one early in the second making it an open and nicely poised match - an excellent advert for the non league game. In the end Aldershot showed why they are top of the league and deservedly held the 2-1 lead. A return to the league game seems on the cards - and given what the club has been through in the past 20 years, and the quality of football they play, you can't begrudge them it.

Overall a very pleasant start to 2008 - who knows, watching more live football may be a 'resolution' that can be kept!

This year I resolve...

Well, last year's didn't go exactly to plan.

I'll have to wait for the official 2007 listing to come out, but I suspct that once again, for some completely inexplicable reason, I have probably failed to become one of the 10 sexiest men in the world. I mean, really, what has Jonny Depp got? Okay, apart from great looks... a good sense of humour... a sucessful Hollywood career... a lovely family life in France... great reviews for his upcoming Sweeney Tood movie. I mean *apart* from all that?.?.?

Anyway.... those resolutions I may have made for 2008 have probably been broken already...

However your 2008 resolutions are going, I wish you all a very happy and lovely 2008.

Only 360 something days until...

So, how was it for you? Guess I spent much of Christmas as many did - time with family, friends and the motorway network of the UK.

Spent a couple of days in Birmingham doing traditional Christmas things - turkey and sprouts for lunch, a session on the Wii in the afternoon mixed with the requisite amount of time lying on the sofa like an overfed python. The most constructive thing I've done over the period was help build a wooden triceratops - OK, so its leg fell off, but a partial achievement nonetheless.

Then headed down to Devon for a couple days. Coastal scenery and sea breezes - it's not just Skegness that's so bracing. Overall a few days of doing little very little other than sitting on the sofa chatting, surfing or reading - things I don't do enough of during the rest of the year.

Whatever you did, no matter how bad you were on the games console of your choice, hope you had some nice gifts, time to relax, and an enjoyable few days.

Happy Christmas

Last Sunday the minister at my church did a wonderful talk about the iconography of Christmas cards. It was exactly the sort of talk churches should do more often - relevant, amusing and informative. I was looking through my cards again today and was not quite sure what he would make of some of them. Several feature penguins (what, they weren't in your nativity scene?), some have snowmen, and one, somewhat bizarrely, is a picture of a bicycle covered in snow. My favourite is the one below - surely nothing quite truly captures the spirit of Christmas than women in the 1930s throwing snowballs at each other in bathing suits??


Whatever your feelings are about Christmas - be it the warmth of spending time with family, the annoyance of the consumerism, or the joy of 'the reason for the season' - I wish you all a very Happy Christmas.

The thought that counts?

Christmas Eve is a great time to do the gift shopping. The train and shops were both really quiet first thing this morning, it seemed almost civilised. Anyway, I select the final gift and head to the till. I hand it over, the assistant looks at the gift, looks at me and asks, "would you like a gift receipt with that?"

It's come to this, even the sales assistants are critiquing my gift selections...

The Twelve Days of Christmas?

On the first day of Christmas..
It was the postman who knocked on the door. “No problem with the pear tree, squire,” he said, handing me a potted plant, “but I’m afraid we’ve had to take the partridge into protective custody. There’s rules you know, what with bird ‘flu and all.”

On the second day of Christmas..
Some very threatening fellows from a sealife preservation society turned up. “Turtles,” their spokesman said aggressively, “are a protected species.”
“I’ll think you’ll find these are not turtles, but turtle doves,” I explained. He was horrified. “You’ve crossed a turtle with a dove?” he exclaimed. “I’ll have the GM people onto you,” and he stormed off.

On the third day of Christmas..
It was Customs and Excise demanding to know why I had not secured an import licence for the French hens.

On the fourth day of Christmas..
Was wrecked by the calling birds. I took them to be friends of my son, but he denied all knowledge of it, and they kept us awake half the night calling each other on their mobiles.

On the fifth day of Christmas..
The postman left a card asking me to pick up a consignment of five gold rings, which sounded good until I turned up at the depot…

On the sixth day of Christmas..
And found that they were attached to the feet of all but one of half-a-dozen geese. “I hope you realise,” the postal officer said, “that tagged geese are the property of the tagger, and may not be slaughtered and consumed over the festive period.”

On the seventh day of Christmas..
A liveried footman turned up from the Palace with a query about the provenance of a septet of swans that had been sent to me - presumably by the same anonymous troublemaker as had sent me the other items. “If these are royal swans from the river Thames,” he said, “we could have you for treason.”

On the eighth day of Christmas..
The eight milkmaids, complete with cows, attracted a swarm of council officials, from the food standards people to the brothel licensing authorities, arguing over whether to prosecute me for trading in unpasteurised milk or running a disorderly house.

On the ninth day of Christmas..
But when the nine ladies dancing turned up as well, the vice squad gained the upper hand in that dispute.

On the tenth day of Christmas..
The consignment of Lords that arrived seemed set to restore a bit of decorum, until the Lords starting leaping. “Have you done a risk assessment for this activity?” the insurance people wanted to know. “We cannot hold ourselves responsible, under the terms of your contract, for any injuries that may result from the collision of a Lord with your low ceilings.”

On the eleventh day of Christmas..
This was the worst so far, when we were woken by the sound of bagpipes played by a contingent of almost a dozen pipers. My cries of “Go away” were drowned by their inexorable honking (or that may have been the geese, it was difficult to tell) and then my door was nearly knocked down by a man from the council demanding to know whether we had a music licence. “This,” I said, gesturing towards the bagpipes, “is not music,” but my argument lost a good deal of its strength when..

On the twelfth day of Christmas..
A dozen drummers turned up to accompany them.

Mr Allen? I've something to tell you...

I notice in the news that Lily Allen (a popular musical entertainer for the young people I believe) is pregnant. Also notice that the father is Ed Simons, one of the Chemical Brothers (a popular skiffle group I believe m'lud) - she's 22, he's 37.

Couple of asides. Firstly, he clearly has not read the rules about ages for your partner - either don't date anyone younger than you by more than 5 years or take your age, divide by 2 and add 9 to give the youngest 'acceptable age'. What?? You've never read these either??

Secondly, not sure I'd want to be the one to have to tell Keith Allen he's about to become a grandfather...

'tis the season...

The usual busy run up to Christmas with people at work trying to clear their in-trays and finish things before the Christmas break.

The 'fun' has been added to this week with a promotion interview. So, on Tuesday morning I was put through my paces about business planning, the potential impact of International Financial Reporting Standards, huggy staff issues, and what are the things to consider when wanting to sell things through the internet? Riveting stuff I think you'll agree - a slightly surreal time to be honest.

End result is a promotion with effect from 1st April. Let's not read too much significance in to the date shall we??

Website of the week

So, do you think you've done a lot with your life?

Have a look here and compare with others...

Seem familiar??

I'm not entirely sure who Rhydian actually is...

...but he did look strangely familiar.

Ready for my close up

Came across this wonderful quotation the other day.

"He wore his baldness like an expensive hat, as if it were out of the question for him to have hair like other men." Cecil B DeMille

For *some* reason it seemed to resonate with me....

"The time is ten to eight..."

Saw this on the excellent postsecret.

Website of the week

Now, there's not a bloke out there who wouldn't wish to enter this.

An early Christmas present?

Been another 'interesting' week at work. The new head of department is settling in - and a couple of the other senior staff have resigned.

Fortunately the two aren't linked - one is going to a better job and the other is retiring - but the fact remains that in a couple of months I will be the only senior member of the department who was in place 6 months earlier.

The good news is that a promotion opportunity has opened up. The bad is I'll be under more pressure should I get it - a tricky dilemma.

In the end I've applied for the promotion - but it's not in the circumstances I'd have liked. Interview will be in a couple of weeks and I'll know by Christmas.

It could be a case of be careful what you wish for...

In conversation

Was out with a few friends last night for a meal - people I've met through an evening class so I don't know them that well or in a 'social' setting. A very pleasant evening during which I appeared to show far too much knowledge about cardigans being this season's 'must have' for men (which they are), but you really need to be tall and thin to wear them (which I'm not).

Snippets of conversation from others included,

"I don't like meeting celebrities even since then time I was 10 and met Bruce Forsyth and he blanked me."

"It's great, I like my job. Tomorrow I'm working in a different branch - it's the one where one of the other staff used to be George in Rainbow."

Website of the week

How would Jack Bauer have coped with mid 90s technology?

Find out here.

It that's the answer...

Am I the only one who finds the arrest of Harry Redknapp slightly amusing?

It's the whole paranoia - thinking that the timing of the arrest is part of some bigger conspiracy to prevent him becoming the next England manager.

Firstly, if Harry Redknapp is the answer to England's problems then things are a lot worse than we feared.

Secondly, a wider conspiracy? There's no way the FA are that organised!

The Transformation Continues...

OK, I know I'm touch with my feminine side. One person often jokingly calls me their 'gayest straight friend'. We're all metrosexual now. It's the noughties, lets deal with it. However, even I had a slight inwards wry smile tonight.

It's been a rough week; what did I end up doing tonight? Bought some nice new shoes.

Sometimes I can be such a girl...

A proper management guru

Earlier this year I was sent on a 'leadership programme' by my employer - see here for the sort of things we did. Anyway, last night was the annual 'alumni' gathering for the people who'd been on the programme over the years. A good chance to hear a talk by a London Business School professor, catch up with some people who I met on the programme, and drink room temperature white wine whilst eating slightly poncey canapes. Exactly - not really my sort of thing... to be honest, it was fine and there are worse ways to spend a couple of hours.

At one point the LBS lecturer commented that he and his academic partner had recently been listed at number 32 in 'The Thinkers 50 - the world's most important and influential thinkers'. Given the top 10 includes Richard Branson, Bill Gates, Michael Porter, Jack Welch, Tom Peters and Alan Greenspan (all men you notice?? a glass ceiling for women in business anyone??) I think this was supposed to impress us. Well it didn't - especially when he then admitted that number 21 on the list was Scott Adams, the creator of Dilbert.

Now, Dilbert, there's a proper management guru - at least he's in the real world.

Website of the week

Forget the social networks of Bebo, MySpace and Facebook.

Join an anti-social network - enjoy hatebook.

The wacky world of football

Apparently Steve Bruce's move from Birmingham to Wigan has been held up over a dispute about a payment he received for 'image rights'.

Steve Bruce...

Image rights...

Insert your own joke here.

There's a shocker!

So, England haven't qualified for Euro 2008 - to be honest I'm glad. England simply didn't deserve it - and the sooner we all realise that England aren't actually that good, the better.

The EPL may be fast, furious and full of Sky induced excitment - but it's all hype. Players are overpaid, overhyped, technically lacking, and prematurely labelled 'world class'. Not a single player in the England squad is 'world class' - how may would make an Italian, Brazilian or even a US squad? Answer, none. How many play abroad? One - and his last game was against Hollywood FC.

At its heart football is a very beautiful, and very simple, team game. You pass it to a player in your team, work your way up the pitch and eventually you'll get a semi decent chance to have a shot - that's it. It's not long, optimistic balls down the centre of the pitch. It's not long throw ins to 'the big guy up front'. It's not being flash or having passion. It's not diving and getting dubious penalties. It's simple - possession and technique - the two areas England lack. England had an easy group from which to qualify - unlike Scotland or Northern Ireland who have done superbly and haven't received anything like the praise they deserve.

The only thing worse than England? The BBC coverage. Lineker, Hansen, Shearer and Wright are awful. Lineker would be a good pundit - and at least he's actually done something in big tournaments - but he shouldn't be fronting the show. Much as like I Hansen, he is descending into a caricature of himself. Shearer was dull as player and is as equally dull on TV. Whilst I admire his loyalty to Newcastle, he was found wanting on the big international stage so I can never take his criticism of players not performing at the top level seriously. As for Ian Wright - the man can barely string a sentence together at the best of times, and the fact that the England squad includes his son should immediately disbar him from the pundit panel. The sooner Auntie Beeb wakes up and puts a decent football panel together the better. My suggestion; it needs a balance of professional, yet knowledgable, presenters and some ex-pros - Adrian Chilles hosting with the pundits being Lineker, James Richardson and Strachan or O'Neil.

Anyway, back to the football. England have made the beautiful game, ugly. McClaren should go, Barwick should go, Gerrard, Lampard and Beckham should all go. Put Brooking in charge of the FA, get sensible coaching at youth level throughout the country, and employ Hiddink - who has worked miracles with Holland, South Korea, Australia and Russia - at whatever salary he wants.

Still, at least we'll now have a genuine festival of football next summer - England will not be missed.

Website of the week

You think your passport photo is bad?

It could be so much worse - enjoy celebrity mugshots.

Thanks, for, that.

Was shopping in Boots. When I got my receipt I also a voucher for £2 off my next purchase of...

...haircare products.

In my case, that's just cruel.

Listen very carefully

Spotted, yesterday afternoon on a train, legendary TV comedy stalwart of 'Allo,'Allo and Porridge, Sam Kelly.

I know, I know.... I'm one step away from train spotting...

Website of the week

Need to improve your time management?

Not enough hours in the day?

How about a 28 hour day??

And to your left...

Spent most of the day sequested away in meeting. But when the view out of the window is this - it's not all bad.

Website of the week

For vital information in these dangerous times see here??

A Living Legend

OK, currently having a 'state visit' from my Mum. What to do?? Theatre trip seems a good option and I scour the listings. A production of Faustus?? I'd quite like it but doubtful it's my Mum's thing. Production of Romeo & Juliet?? Perhaps, but possibly too much of an experimental production and not sure Shakespeare is her thing also... West End musical?? Good idea, but tickets are starting at £70 each.

Chance upon a production of Dr Dolittle. Other than 'talking to the animals' I know little about the story. The star is Tommy Steele - this seems ideal for the 'state visit' so tickets booked.

Well the story is the sort of thing that if it had been devised in the 60s by an experimental theatre group you would have put it down to them having smoked too many bananas. Talking animals, dodos, giant sea slugs and the two headed Pushmi Pullyu (how does it go to the toilet??) are all the sort of things inspired by a bad acid trip. Also the minor love story between Dr Dolittle and Emma Fairfax - a women young enough to not only be his daughter but his granddaughter - is a little troubling.

However, the star of the show was most definitely Tommy Steele. In a career spanning over 50 years we forget just what a big star he was, and indeed is. And here he is, age 70, still carrying a 2 hour musical note perfect for 8 performances a week. OK, not necessarily my sort of theatre experience, I'm not a fan of musicals (the only exception is Singing in the Rain - and that's because if you remove all the songs you still have a great satire on Hollywood) but you have to admire and respect a genuine theatrical stalwart and national institution.

So, farewell then Tony Soprano?

And so it ended - The Sopranos, a show that was groundbreaking, shocking, genre-defining, and, I would argue, one that eventually almost became a cliche of itself, has finally come to a close.

Over the years it's been fascinating watching the relationships around Tony evolve - especially those between himself and Uncle Junior and his sister, Janice. It's also been fun watching AJ and Meadow grow up - as they first realise, and then accept, exactly what their father does for a living.

However... the ending??? I felt cheated - it had 'future Christmas special' written all over it. As a creator and director who often sought to 'break the mould', I expected more from David Chase.

Website of the week

The iPhone? Credit cards? Golf balls?

And a blender?

Well, will it blend?

Ratatouille

Rats. Kitchens. Is it just me or have UB40 really missed out by neither supplying the theme tune, nor a tie in release of a single, with the distribution of the new Disney/Pixar movie?

Anyway... Remy possesses a great sense of smell, an ability to cook and ends up in a kitchen of a famous restaurant in Paris. The fact that he is rat doesn't hinder him and before long he is turning the kitchen garbage boy - a slacker/stoner type who would be played by Keanu Reeves in a live action version of the film - into the hottest chef in town.

There is comedy, romance and cuteness in abundance in this picture - several times most of the women in the cinema went 'ahhh' at various saccharine moments. Technically the film is superb, the animation is magnificent with the food, Paris and the rats all looking stunning. Unfortunately the story is a bit, well, Disney. I think I have two quibbles, firstly, it lacks the humour and bite of previous Pixar outings, like Toy Story and The Incredibles. Secondly, the story goes on a bit of a walkabout about two-thirds of the way in - 10 minutes could have been axed and I feel the pacing would have improved.

But, in reality, these are minor quibbles. The film is far better, and funnier, than most comedies I've seen this year, and the short animation that accompanies it is a brilliant warm-up featurette. If nothing else you'll leave the cinema hungry and wanting to visit Paris.

This doesn't apply to be me...

... but at what point does 'being organised' become 'obsessive compulsive disorder'??

Website of the week

Grommit's favourite TV channel??

Enjoy the cheese.

Paris in the autumn

For some reason the mid morning Eurostar to Paris was full of rugby fans...

It also ran out of beer before reaching Paris...

Linked?

England Expects??

So, the football team who are supposed to be 'world class' and full of 'greats' and 'superstars' are unlikely to qualify for Euro 2008.

Yet the rugby team, who a month ago capitulated to a workmanlike opponent in a group match, have somehow ended up in the World Cup Final.

Sport - it's just cruel.

Well, Cilla

Over the nibbles before a meeting last night a friend sidles up for a catch up chat - what have you been up to since we last met? how are things? - the usual stuff. A pause, and then...

"Anyway, there's this woman who has just started working with me - I think she'd be great for you."

Well, you have to admire their directness! Never quite know what to say in these situations. I'm always slightly (but only slightly) intrigued as to who my friends would consider to be my 'type' and set me up with - my mind wanders to the scene in Notting Hill when the friends of Hugh the bookshop owner set up a range of dinner dates with an increasingly bizarre collection of women.

Batted it back with the usual 'a couple of years ago this would have annoyed me but now I'm grateful - it shows you've not given up hope for me yet!'

Mind you - did I miss the memo? This has been the second time this has happened in a month (see here) - perhaps friends feel my time is running out and making a last ditch effort?! ;o)

A lot on your plate?

At the church service last night the minister gave us a paper plate to write things on as a way to illustrate the message.

All fine... but I couldn't help wandering what others made - several grown-ups walking down the high street carrying paper plates with felt-tipped writing on at 8pm on a Sunday evening.

Website of the week

Do you ever worry about invitations that are 'black tie'?

What exactly is 'business casual' or 'cocktail dress - informal'?

Do you know what's acceptable for 'smart casual'?

The answers are here.

Explains a lot...

So far this week only one of my journeys on SouthWest Trains has been on time. Tonight there was the following annoucement.

"The 17:29 is running 8 minutes late and is due in at 17:38."

When they can't the basic maths right...

Double meaning??

Noticed on an advert that Katie Melua's new song contains the lyric,

"If you were a piece of wood, I'd nail you."

Now, is it just me?.?.?

Probably...

Kenny

Quite how the filmakers pitched the idea of a 'mockumentary' following an Aussie bloke who works in 'corporate bathroom rentals' I don't know - but Kenny is a wonderfully quirky movie.

Kenny is a 'plumber' working in 'corporate bathrooms rentals', i.e. he supplies the portaloos you seen at umpteem festivals - the exact quantity needed varies depending on whether alcohol or curries are available at the event. He's an ordinary bloke, doing a vital job - he sees the necessity of the service he provides and seeks to do it to the best of his ability. Above all he's not ashamed of his job, even if his friends and family are.

Yes - there's lots of toilet based humour in this film, but little is gratutitous. You get the philosphical ramblings of an everyday, good, solid Australian bloke who knows people probably think less of him because of his job, but is determined to see the bigger picture.

It could have easily descended into a dreadful 'gross-out' comedy, but it doesn't. There are even some wonderfully poignant moments looking at his relationships with both his father and son, and a sweet romantic interlude at a trade exhibtion in Nashville.

Unfortunately it seems to have a fairly limited release in the UK, which is a pity - it's like Kath and Kim with more toilet gags, which you would have thought would be a winning commercial proposition here. If you get chance - and can stomach toilet humour - go and see it, you'll be rewarded with a lovely little character driven comedy.

Website of the week

Away on holiday or business??

Fed up with expensive hotels or impersonal travelodges??

Then try Couch Surfing

How did that happen??

England win?!

France win?!

At this rate we'll have an England v Scotland rugby world cup final.

Seeing the forest for the trees?

After a varied week - time for a Saturday morning stroll and some space.

TW3

That was the week that was... A 'fun' week.

Interview went well but, as expected, I didn't get offered the promotion. Not a huge surprise as it would have been a massive promotion. Main aim was not to disgrace myself in the interview - and the early feedback is I didn't, quite the contrary. The following days contained office gossip about who was going to the get the job. Friday morning the current head of dept came into my office.

"It's X," he said.
"Really?" was my mildly surprised response. "That will be ... interesting."
"Yes... it'll put a lot of pressure on you."

I was sworn to secrecy, it won't be 'official' until Monday.

Interesting times ahead...

Blimey...

Have been called for interview...

Extreme outcomes would be
a) disgrace,
b) being actually offered the job.

Not sure which is more frightening...

Website of the week

Now, do they get away with this dirty dancing or is it way too cheesy and smug??

What's more worrying is there are at least 2 cameras involved, so someone has gone to the trouble to mix/edit it!

Does that make it even worse??

Have applied...

What have I done??

Main aim - do not disgrace myself.

What would you do???

During my travels around the UK the past month it's fair to say I've not missed South West Trains one little bit - since my return to work not a single journey to or from work has been on time.

Anyway, current debate seems to be whether I should apply...

Back in 5 mins

Back to work. Not too bad as less than 400 emails in my inbox - I've had worse.

Big change is the head of department has got a promotion elsewhere in the organisation - wonder who the replacement will be.

Rememer you're a Womble

Out cycling and discover that not only is Wimbledon Common home to the Wombles but also the Wimbledon Windmill Museum.

Surely I'm not the only one who finds this a little bizarre? Make a note to return to find out what it's all about.

OK - windmills obviously... but all the same... slightly left field surely??

Raindrops keep falling

Back in London to a mass of washing, unpacking and mail.

Unload the bike rack and roof bars and decide my car has earnt the treat of a car wash - it is looking rather dirty.

Discovering a leak in the car during the car wash adds to the excitement of the day.

What happened to Berni Inns??

Stop over in Birmingham for a couple of days on my way back down south and catch up with family and friends. Sunday lunch is taken in a carvery - they're slightly strange places with an interesting mix of patrons. There are young families, often augmented with a grandparent, are larger family groups, or senior citizen couples out for a Sunday lunch - not the sort of mixed demographic you would see at other types of restaurant. Guess me and my mum add to the strangeness. One thing I have noticed is you rarely see a non-white face even in a multicultural city like Brum... guess it's an acquired English taste??

Staying with some friends who half jokingly are suggesting they set me up with someone they have in mind - it's polite mickey-taking. A few years ago it's the sort of thing that really annoyed me but now I take a more positive view - at least they haven't yet abandoned all hope for me! ;o)

But is it art??

Having seen his recent exhibition on the South Bank, and the installation at Blundell Sands, seeing as I'm passing it would be rude not to visit Anthony Gormley's most famous work - so here I am.

Like much of his other work I've seen it's impressive - the sheer scale of the installation is amazing - but I come away from it thinking "yeah... and..?". Probably makes me some form of ghastly artistic philistine but if I walk away from a piece of art thinking "well, what was the artist trying to say?" you can't help but conclude that the artist has failed on one level. Recently the Angel of the North came second on a list of most disappointing tourist attractions - it was behind Stonehenge. A bit unfair I feel - I may not be a huge fan of the piece but it is a stunning artistic installation on a huge scale.


On the way south I make an unscheduled and impulsive stop at the Yorkshire Sculpture Park. It's an amazing place with wonderful galleries and beautiful sculptures (such as Moore and Hepworth) set in the rolling Yorkshire countryside. Spent a lovely couple of hours wandering around enjoying it all - made all the more enjoyable as it was visited purely on a whim. Only slight disappointment is with it being so far from where I live I expect I'll be a rare visitor.

Hogwarts

There are 2 things which seem to almost dominate the town of Alnwick, one of which is Alnwick Castle and Gardens. So today I head off to nose around the castle. The home of the Duke of Northumberland it is as you'd imagine a castle to be - and again going around the State Rooms I couldn't but help notice the various Canaletto and Titian paintings - no Athena posters of 'girl scratching her bum playing tennis' here.

Recently the castle has taken on a new form of fame as it was used for the exterior location shots of Hogwarts in the first two Harry Potter films, and at one point I did hear a guide point out the location of the Quidditch match. Wonder what previous Dukes would have made of Pottermania and their home's small part in it?

The other big thing in Alnwick is the excellent Barter Books - a large second hand bookshop in what was the old railway station. A simply superb place in which I spent a very pleasant couple of hours - and several £££s - last evening. An absolute gem.

Holy Island

Driving across the causeway to Lindisfarne is a little disconcerting - it's as though the tarmac has simply been laid on the beach - which is probably more or less the situation. It does make you feel vulnerable and I make a mental note to leave clearly within the safe crossing times - I don't fancy being on this road when the tide is rolling in.

I like islands - don't know why as a grew up in Birmingham which is about as far from an island a you can get in the UK - but I'm not sure what to make of Lindisfarne. Is it an island or isn't it? For large parts of the day you can easily drive across to it, but equally for other large parts it is cut off and definitely an island - does this 'part time' nature of being an island mean living there is different to, say, the Western Isles?

It is still nonetheless fairly remote and off the beaten track and, like so much else in Northumbria, is beautiful with stunning bays and the seemingly obligatory castle. It is given something else by the presence of the Priory. Fascinating to wander around and simply feel and sense the history of the place and like many other such places, for example Glastonbury Abbey, I can but imagine what the place must have looked like in its 'prime', or, indeed, how different it may look today if Henry VIII had dissolved the monasteries.

A wonderful place I wish I could spend more time here today - but the safe crossing times mean I head back to mainland after a few fascinating hours spent on Holy Island.

Coast

Weather again looks decent so I hoist the bike back on the roof bars and do a route taking in the Northumbria coast. I seem again to be constantly cycling into a headwind, no matter what direction I'm going in, but I'm rewarded with stunning scenery - beaches, bays and ruined castles - this really is a beautiful part of the country.

Berwick upon Tweed and my first castle

Berwick is a strange place. Being on the border it has often been fought over by the English and the Scots and so it has a lot of history - but there's not a great deal to do there. Having had a walk around the old town walls and read the various information about its history - plus the stuff about Lowry who visited and painted the place a lot - I head off to find something to eat. Can recommend the restaurant attached to the arts centre - such places are often a good bet as they need to raise money towards such centre runing costs so they tend to be decent - and had fantastic fishcakes.

Berwick is a place with dual identity. The accents are likely to be Scottish as much a north east England, my change was given to me in Scottish notes, the church with the spire dominating the skyline is actually Church of Scotland (the adjacent CofE pictured above was built under the reign of Cromwell so is more muted and has no spire). A nice town, but one which nowadays probably struggles with its identity and purpose.

In the afternoon I stop off as Bamburgh Castle. Now this is a proper castle - walls 10 feet thick, built on a hill, overlooking the sea and dominating the landscape. Another place full of history - though much of its current look was due to its restoration in the late 19th century.

I'm always fascinated by the art on the walls in such places, and this is no exception as among the various paintings are some by Turner and Van Dyck. Always makes my tasteful prints from the Tate seem somewhat inferior!